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Anthony & Ben
Here's our promise to you: We'll love your child with an honestly-believe-their-finger-paintings-are-masterpieces, watch-Frozen-a-hundred-times, stand-on-the-sidelines-cheering, deep, joyful love. We'll love them with all of our hearts. And we'll dedicate ourselves to filling their world with laughter, magic, and learning. Thank you for considering us. We are grateful beyond measure.
Our Religious Beliefs
It's interesting: Even though Ben grew up in a Jewish family, Anthony knows Hebrew better than he does! And Anthony, who is a minister, believes that Ben is the most truly Christian person he knows.
We think that, together, we get the best of both traditions. (And we get twice the holidays!) Ben loves candlelight Christmas Eve services and the balcony full of trumpets blaring on Easter Sunday. Anthony loves the rich symbolism of the Passover seder.
We hold many values in common: We believe in gratitude. We believe in honesty and kindness. We believe that being compassionate and helping others should be a way of life.
Of course, we don't believe all of the same things. And we don't expect our children to, either. We'll go to church, say grace before meals, light the menorah, and string popcorn garland for the Christmas tree. But we'll leave a lot of room for them to ask questions, think for themself, and have different ideas and opinions.
Our Leisure Time
Anthony tends to be more of a hobby guy, while Ben is more into relaxing.
But both of us love reading, watching movies and TV together, going for hikes and runs, playing board games (we played Scrabble on our first date, but we promise we're not really THAT nerdy!), and spending time on the beach, both in town, or on Cape Cod where we rent a house in the summer.
We also volunteer whenever we get the chance, and especially enjoy participating in a monthly board game night at a halfway house and addiction treatment center, and getting to know the guys there.
Anthony's hobbies include gardening, music (guitar and piano), and, more recently, building really intricate, architectural Lego sets. (We now have a Lego city in the basement, but Anthony promises he won't be like the dad in the Lego movie and will happily let kids play with them!)
Ben spends a lot of his free time cooking and baking, whether for friends and family or just for us, doing crossword puzzles, and staying in touch with friends.
Qualities We Love, Admire and Respect in Each Other
Anthony thinks that Ben is the most generous and giving person he knows. Ben is always thinking about other people: about a gift he can give them or something he can do for them to make them smile. He is the most caring, supportive, and loyal friend; he works hard to nurture deep friendships.
Ben is also hilarious. He's always ready with a joke, and fills every day with laughter and joy. He makes people feel good and feel comfortable.
Ben is inspired every day by Anthony's drive, passion, dedication, and commitment—in his work, his hobbies, and in our home and family. Everything he does, he does thoughtfully and with excitement that's contagious.
Ben has never met someone who takes growing as a person and learning new things as seriously as Anthony does. He's always learning something—a new instrument or new language—and experimenting—with an exercise routine or plant in the garden. It's going to be amazing to watch him share this love, curiosity, and dedication with children.
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Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a picture-perfect small town on the coast in Connecticut. It's a truly beautiful place, with a cozy downtown, woods, ponds, old stone walls crisscrossing open fields, and rambling farm houses.
There are two town beaches, dozens of playgrounds and parks (where we take our dog every day), tennis and pickleball courts, and tons of places to set out from in a kayak.
Our school district is one of the best in the country and offers incredible extracurricular programs: summer arts and theater camps, state champion sports teams, a youth-run paramedic team.
We are a five-minute walk from town, and the train station there (which makes getting into New York City a breeze). Many of our good friends, who all have young kids (including a few newborns!), also live within walking distance.
We're also lucky that Anthony is the minister at a church that's at the heart of our community. It's a fun, warm, relaxed, and loving place—basically a large extended family! Even Ben (who is not a church person) loves it!
We live in a charming, colonial house filled with books, musical instruments, and plants. And there's always some homemade treat sitting out on the kitchen counter!
Our Extended Families
Ben's family lives about an hour away, and so we're lucky enough to see them often, all throughout the year.
Hosting big family meals around the holidays are an important tradition for us. We love having everyone over, eating delicious food, laughing all day, playing board games, watching movies, and singing along to favorite songs. We also love visiting Ben's sister in New York City, and we're excited to share the excitement of the city (The "American Girl Doll" store! Dinosaur exhibitions at the Natural History Museum!) with a child.
Anthony's family mostly lives on the West Coast, but they are so excited to welcome another child into the family that some of them are already looking at houses in Connecticut! Visiting Anthony's family—in California, Arizona, and on a ranch in Colorado—always makes for a special, fun trip. We're looking forward to exploring so many different parts of the country with a child, and seeing the Rockies and the Grand Canyon and the redwoods through their eyes!
From Us to You
We don't know you yet, but, in some way, it feels like we do. It's hard to explain. But, it's like: you're out there, somewhere, and we're going to be family in this amazing way, and our lives are all going to change and change together.
We're already rooting for you. Believing in you. Inching toward you in our hopes and in our dreams.
We know that you're amazing and that you're our hero. But we don't know what this journey has been like for you. We don't want to make assumptions.
We want to follow your lead here. We are ready to open our hearts and our lives to you - in whatever way you feel comfortable with. We will send letters and photos. We're happy to text or email or talk by phone. Visits would also feel good to us. But, again, whatever we do has to be right for you.
We want to honor you and celebrate you in all that we say and do. Because we know that there will be a lot of you in this child that we hope to be lucky enough to get to love.
We have both always dreamt of being parents. It was more than a dream, though; it was - and it is - a calling. We feel called to it. We feel like being parents is part of who we are supposed to be.
We talked about it on our first date seven years ago (which, you know, is maybe a little forward or intense, but that's how much it felt like parenting was in our bones!). And we've talked about it over and over again since then. Now, almost three years into our marriage, settled in a new home in a new town, with our village of supportive family and friends standing by, we feel ready to do more than talk about it and dream about it.
We live in a charming small town in coastal New England, just a short train ride away from NYC. It's the kind of town where kids still walk to get ice cream after school. We moved here and moved into our classic old colonial home because we knew this would be an amazing place to raise a child.
We're biased, but we think our home is warm and cozy, filled with color and light and art and old oriental rugs and interesting things we've collected from our travels. It's got a great lived-in feel to it: neat and tidy enough that people can drop by unannounced, but just messy enough that they feel comfortable kicking back and hanging out. It's a great house, but we think what it's really missing is stains on the wallpaper where baby food was flung during some dinnertime melt-down.
We can see a child here with us: dancing with us in the kitchen, snuggling by the fire, putting all the nooks and crannies to good use playing hide-and-seek, talking to the dog like it's a human being.
We can promise you: We'll be great at Christmas morning, helping with homework, reading bedtime stories, coming up with nicknames, talking through the hard stuff, and loving them unconditionally.
Thank you for being out there, and for being you. We can't wait to meet you.
Anthony & Ben
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