In order to begin the adoption process you must be fully committed, meaning you must leave infertility treatments behind you and look forward to the journey ahead. This is easier said than done.
Moving on from infertility may take months or years. It is truly a process, but it is possible. For those considering adoption, but unsure whether they are truly ready, here are a few signs you’re ready to make the leap.
You have grieved your inability to have biological children.
Healthy grieving is probably one of the most important aspects of moving on from infertility. Families should move through all stages of grief at their own pace, which may not be the same pace as your partner. Explore every avenue available to you, whether it’s a new medicine or a new diet. Allow yourself to be sad, angry or both. Turn to your partner to comfort each other. Allow yourself to imagine becoming a family via adoption. Once you have come to terms with the fact that biology is not what makes a child yours, you may be ready to pursue adoption.
You have accepted that you won’t become pregnant.
This is likely the hardest thing for women. To move from infertility to adoption means not experiencing life growing inside you. It means missing out on attentive and doting family and friends, seeing your child via sonogram, being the guest of honor at a baby shower, and the pains and joy of bringing a child into the world. While these may be things you miss, there are plenty of beautiful and unique moments brought with adoption. Getting “the call” that a mother has chosen you, finding out the sex of your child, having a birth mother hand you your baby, sharing a beautiful bond with the child’s birth parents, and the joy of having your lifelong dreams realized after so much heartache. The gift of adoption is just as beautiful and wonderful as childbirth.
You feel hopeful about adoption.
Once you’ve started to move past infertility you may find yourself daydreaming about adopting a child. You may find yourself imagining what it would be like to raise a child who does not look like you. You may also find yourself perusing adoption websites with a sense of hope for the future. This is a breakthrough. You are finally able to see yourself building a family in a new and exciting way.
You are excited to meet the child who is meant to be with your family.
You have finally found the path for you, the way that you were meant to build your family. You have realized that just because you couldn’t have biological children doesn’t mean you can’t have a family. There is a child out there who is meant to be in your arms and you can’t wait to meet him or her.
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If you and your partner are ready to pursue adoption you can request free adoption information or talk to one of our Adoptive Family Specialists by calling us anytime at 1-800-ADOPTION.
