Emotions run high in any adoption situation and adoptive families don’t always know how to act or react to certain circumstances. The best thing for families to do in these situations is to turn to their adoption social worker for advice.
Here are the top 5 things your social worker wants you to know going into an adoption:
- Adoption can be overwhelming, frustrating, and tiresome. But it is oh so worth it. The stack of adoption paperwork is daunting, but every single piece is important to the overall success of your adoption. We will ask personal, and sometimes painful, questions. We expect you to be open and honest in your answers. We will do everything in our power to make this process easier for you, but we can’t promise that there won’t be hiccups.
- We cannot control what expectant parents reveal to us. We can never guarantee that an expectant mother is being totally honest with us, but we will give you every bit of information we can about her situation.
- If an expectant mother doesn’t tell the 100% truth, don’t take it personally. These women are going through an emotional decision that we can’t ever imagine. It’s not always easy for them to disclose everything. They fear judgement, persecution and rejection from adoptive families. Put yourself in their shoes as much as possible!
- Birth mothers love to hear that you’re thinking about them. As social workers we see many raw emotions from both the adoptive family side and the birth parent side. It is a truly bittersweet situation; you watch pure joy and happiness on one end, and heartbreak on the other. Sometimes all a birth mother needs to get her through the day is to know that you care.
- Adoption does not end with finalization. Adoption is a lifelong journey. You and your child will be forever connected to their birth parents, and they to you. Keep your promises to birth parents and don’t completely cut off contact. This can cause unimaginable pain and suffering on both sides. This relationship is one to cherish and build upon for years to come.
